Navigating midlife transitions – How can therapy help Late Bloomers find clarity.
By Ana Brown B.A Psychology, Mental Health Content Writer. Reviewed by Dr. Pascale Piron , Psy.D., M.A., LCPC.
I live in a major city and cannot escape driving on highways. If I don’t take the highway then it takes me forever to get anywhere. But even with faster roads and GPS, sometimes I make the wrong turn, or there is an accident which slows traffic down and I arrive late. It happens. It’s life, for some reason or another some of us arrive at our desired destination a bit later in life.
Many circumstances in life can delay us from achieving our full identity and personal goals before our 50’s or 60’s. Some of us choose to follow common paths such as a career, marriage, children and all of these events that can take up most of our young adulthood. Most of us spend years trying to build a life so focused on family and careers that at some point we forget our own identity and what is true life purpose. It’s very common to experience feelings of loneliness, loss of identity and lack purpose after children grow up and move out, after retirement, divorce, death of a loved one, a serious medical issue and many other life changing moments.
The term “Late bloomer” for adults can be described here by Wikipedia:
A late blooming adult is a person who does not discover their talents and abilities until later than normally expected. In certain cases retirement may lead to discovery.”
Midlife can be a difficult transitional for many people and can negatively impact one’s mental health. Some stressors associated with midlife stage are:
- Increased risk of depression
- Increased risk of anxiety
- Hormonal alterations
- Perception of failure
- Adjustment difficulties
- Cognitive changes
- Loneliness
- Social Isolation
- Body image issues
- Financial hardships
- Aging parents
- Empty nest syndrome
Science and technology has come so far in the last century extending our life span much longer than our great grandparents could have ever imaged. This very notion should prompt us to believe that middle age no longer means old. Some of our abilities and talents although pre-wired in our brains take years to fully come to fully develop. According to an article by Scott Barry Kaufman published on the magazine Psychology Today about late bloomers “In the brain, information gets passed through wires called axons. Helping the wires deliver the information is a fatty coating called the myelin sheath. Myelin speeds the transmission of information, but knowledge itself, and the proliferation of nerve connections and circuits by which we access it, depend on the acquisition of experience. And that takes time. Humans don’t even reach their peak myelin volume until their 50’s.“
In summary, late blooming should be a time when we all feel self-confident and prepare to start our second chapter in life and embark in new adventures and enjoy all the results of the hard work put into our careers and family in our younger years. What research shows is a different reality, the majority of late bloomers are faced with many challenges during a mid life transition. One of the main struggles late bloomers face, is finding themselves or a new identity later in life. After years dedicating our lives to others or careers, or perhaps having experienced traumatic losses, it can be difficult to navigate alone a new journey of self-discovery during a new stage in life.
Self-discovery is an ongoing journey not a destination.
Seeking professional help from a psychologist can help clients discover their full potential and utilize a lifetime of experience into a new season of blooming into their true selves.
HOW CAN THERAPY HELP LATE BLOOMERS FIND THEMSELVES :
Some of us have spent years being parents and caregivers, professionals with a full time career, but these roles may have come to an end, whether your children have grown up or it’s time for retirement. The loss of a lifetime identity can result in several mental health struggles and therapy can shine so much light into anyone’s path crossing these life transitional phases. Additional topics that therapy can help late bloomers with:
- Understand untapped potential
- Explore new identity or identify confusion
- Address fear of failure
- Encourage personal growth
- Improve relationships
- Build authentic confidence
- Find new purpose in life
- Reevaluate societal expectations of success
SOME TYPES OF THERAPY FOR LATE BLOOMERS:
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): Helps clients recognize negative thinking patterns and behaviors that may result in low self-esteem and feelings of failure.
- Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT): Improves emotional regulation, increases distress tolerance and promotes healthier relationships.
- Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing(EMDR): Helpful for clients processing trauma from their past.
- Family Therapy: It helps individuals improve communication skills, reduce conflict and help late bloomers understand their new path and family dynamics at a different stage in life.
If you are experiencing a mental health crisis, always seek professional help immediately. Please call 911 or the suicide prevention lifeline at 988 or go to your local emergency room for immediate medical attention.
Therapy can empower clients to take on new careers, hobbies and interests giving them new purpose and meaning. Having something positive to look forward to and discovering what truly makes us happy later in life prepare us for a healthier and a more fulfilled time during the late blooming years.
Personal fulfillment in later years can be achieved through self-discovery and owning your own time line for success. Let go of society unrealistic expectations that we all must follow the same path to success and personal achievement. We are all unique and will have to face different challenges in life. Embracing your uniqueness and allowing yourself to start a new chapter can be incredibly rewarding. Therapy can offer a safe space for clients to reflect, grow and transform themselves into their better versions later in life.
Life transitions are only opportunities to learn and conquer a new identity. A new chance to reinvent yourself, this time with a wealth of knowledge, a decreased chance of making mistakes and the joy to know that aging is a privilege to be cheered not feared.
Every season in life brings a bloom of new chances to finding the new you.
You are never too old and is never too late.
Be kind. Be brave. Be well.
Always with love,
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HELPFUL LINKS:
Best Ways to Cope with Anxiety
Finding meaning in the second half of life by James Hollis, PH.D
The power of purpose by Richard J. Leider
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline – Call or text 988
Crisis Text Line – text HOME to 74141
DISCLAIMER:
The content of these webpages and blogs and information provided is for general informational and educational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional medical or mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical or mental health condition. Seek professional help immediately if you are experiencing a mental health crisis or any other medical condition.